What Got You Here?

If you had told me 20 years ago that I would one day be sitting in a prison cell, I would have laughed hysterically.

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Extreme domestic violence changed everything in my life. It was devastating.

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In 2020, after years of trauma and addiction, I was sentenced to seven months in prison. I broke the law. I pleaded guilty. I served my sentence. Jail was the best and the worst thing to ever happen to me.

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What Got You Through?

It was the inmates who got me through. Women who had almost nothing gave me friendship, advice, food, laughter and hope. They carried me through some of the darkest months of my life when the system that was supposed to be responsible for my welfare often failed to do so. They were brilliant women, some of the best women I’ve ever met.

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What Happened Next?

Walking out of prison was the beginning of the hardest chapter, as I’d left physically and emotionally exhausted. I’d lost around 40 kilograms, my hair had fallen out, and my mental health was in a terrible state. Every morning I woke with overwhelming panic attacks and wondered how I was ever going to rebuild.

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Although I was still mentally very fragile, I managed to pick up work. Throwing myself back into work gave me structure, purpose and something to focus on besides my own anxiety. Those first few months were incredibly difficult. There were days when I wasn’t sure I could keep going, but slowly, almost without noticing, things began to improve.

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Then after spending years trying to hide that I had been in prison, I decided to tell the truth. Owning my story became one of the most liberating decisions I’ve ever made.

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Today I have returned to journalism, focusing on prison reform, particularly the experiences of women in prison, as well as domestic violence, trauma, addiction, mental illness and what it really takes to rebuild after everything has fallen apart. My hope is that by telling these stories honestly, we can help create a justice system that is both accountable and compassionate.

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If there’s one message I hope people take from my work, it’s we have to stop believing that people should be punished forever. If they’ve served their sentence and are working hard to rebuild their lives, we should be encouraging that, not standing in the way of it. Accountability matters. So does redemption.

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In September I will celebrate six years of sobriety. Looking back, the best gift prison gave me was getting sober.

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If you’re reading this from a prison cell, remember this: your sentence will end. What matters is what you do next. Learn everything you can. Accept help where you can find it. Be kind to yourself when rebuilding feels impossible. Most importantly, don’t let anyone convince you that your future has already been written. It hasn’t. You have served your sentence. You still have the right to build a life worth living.

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There is hope. Sometimes it takes longer than you want it to. Sometimes rebuilding is painfully slow. But if you keep putting one foot in front of the other, life can become something you never imagined. Mine certainly has.