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Experiences
'Glen Innes Church' by Tony, available to purchase at Boom Gate Gallery
The trip to the jail was loud and the noise wasn’t coming from outside my head, it was coming from within: “how long am I gonna do this time”, “but theres not enough drugs in here”, “whats gonna happen next”.
My addiction had led me to the point of a complete life breakdown. This time it was different. It wasn’t just a short stay on remand at Hakea for two or three months. This time I was gonna get a sentence for sure.
And I did, I got two years. I had spent the last 12 months going in and out, stuck in the revolving door, but this time they sent me straight to Casuarina, the maximum security jail.
The biggest thing that caught me off guard when I got out to the sentenced jails was how comfortable people were just doing four or five years like it was nothing.
One of the guys I was on the transfer bus with had been in and out a few times. I could tell by how many people he knew. I heard another guy say, “how long this time brother”, and he goes, “nah just five this time”, and I was shocked.
Five years is 1825 days. The revolving door that is the prison system had got him and he had lost his whole 20s to a prison cell.
Soon enough my parole had been denied and I was laughing and joking with people about how I still had “a few years left in me”. The mind shift happens quickly. It’s a survival tactic, almost a trick your brain plays on you.
Once you settle in and get a routine, jail becomes almost easy. There’s no pressure. You don’t have to work. Food’s given to you daily.
But as human beings, we aren’t designed to be locked in a cage and told when to eat, shit and sleep. It defeats the purpose of why we are here.
If you’re reading this and you’re in jail, you deserve better in your life. You are better than a number. Prison system, and only you can change that via the way you think. Your life isn’t a joke. Don’t waste it.
The second big thing that got me was the phone systems. Life moves quickly on the outside, especially if you’re young. I just expected for people to say yes to being on my call list, and the ones that did barely answered.
Sometimes you wait ages for the phone and if they don’t answer, you just assume they’re busy until you call again and again and no one answers except your mum.
It’s a hard moment, because you’re forced to sit with the consequences of your choices in a different way.
The trip to the jail was loud and the noise wasn’t coming from outside my head, it was coming from within: “how long am I gonna do this time”, “but theres not enough drugs in here”, “whats gonna happen next”.
My addiction had led me to the point of a complete life breakdown. This time it was different. It wasn’t just a short stay on remand at Hakea for two or three months. This time I was gonna get a sentence for sure.
And I did, I got two years. I had spent the last 12 months going in and out, stuck in the revolving door, but this time they sent me straight to Casuarina, the maximum security jail.
The biggest thing that caught me off guard when I got out to the sentenced jails was how comfortable people were just doing four or five years like it was nothing.
One of the guys I was on the transfer bus with had been in and out a few times. I could tell by how many people he knew. I heard another guy say, “how long this time brother”, and he goes, “nah just five this time”, and I was shocked.
Five years is 1825 days. The revolving door that is the prison system had got him and he had lost his whole 20s to a prison cell.
Soon enough my parole had been denied and I was laughing and joking with people about how I still had “a few years left in me”. The mind shift happens quickly. It’s a survival tactic, almost a trick your brain plays on you.
Once you settle in and get a routine, jail becomes almost easy. There’s no pressure. You don’t have to work. Food’s given to you daily.
But as human beings, we aren’t designed to be locked in a cage and told when to eat, shit and sleep. It defeats the purpose of why we are here.
If you’re reading this and you’re in jail, you deserve better in your life. You are better than a number. Prison system, and only you can change that via the way you think. Your life isn’t a joke. Don’t waste it.
The second big thing that got me was the phone systems. Life moves quickly on the outside, especially if you’re young. I just expected for people to say yes to being on my call list, and the ones that did barely answered.
Sometimes you wait ages for the phone and if they don’t answer, you just assume they’re busy until you call again and again and no one answers except your mum.
It’s a hard moment, because you’re forced to sit with the consequences of your choices in a different way.
People have their own lives, their own problems, and sometimes they’re angry and hurt, or just tired of the situation that put you in prison in the first place. They might have other family, friends, or a partner doing the same shit you were on the outside, and they just don’t wanna know about it.
Over time, you learn not to take it personally. You learn that relationships need to be rebuilt, not expected.
And when someone does answer, you appreciate that call a lot more than you ever did on the outside.
The third and biggest thing that got me was “the people”. I got to meet some good hearted people, like genuinely good human beings that had made some bad decisions in their lives and paid some big consequences for it.
Not all of them were monsters. Actually, only a small amount were.
But one thing I realised in jail was meeting good people in prison doesn’t mean you should stay the same when you leave. If anything, it should be the opposite.
Getting out means changing who you are. Evolving into a better version of who you were before. Taking the experience and using it in your life to be better, so I suppose its like you evolve into a new you.
Not just for your friends, family or society, but for you and your life. We only get one shot at it.
There are so many opportunities out there in the world to enjoy. Travelling, spending time with your kids. I know it sounds crazy, but even starting a business and failing is a huge growth lesson. That next time you try you could become the biggest success in that field, with the experience that you learnt inside of jail.
I have started writing these article to hopefully help people reach there full potential and if you’re reading this I hope you get out and reach yours too.
People have their own lives, their own problems, and sometimes they’re angry and hurt, or just tired of the situation that put you in prison in the first place. They might have other family, friends, or a partner doing the same shit you were on the outside, and they just don’t wanna know about it.
Over time, you learn not to take it personally. You learn that relationships need to be rebuilt, not expected.
And when someone does answer, you appreciate that call a lot more than you ever did on the outside.
The third and biggest thing that got me was “the people”. I got to meet some good hearted people, like genuinely good human beings that had made some bad decisions in their lives and paid some big consequences for it.
Not all of them were monsters. Actually, only a small amount were.
But one thing I realised in jail was meeting good people in prison doesn’t mean you should stay the same when you leave. If anything, it should be the opposite.
Getting out means changing who you are. Evolving into a better version of who you were before. Taking the experience and using it in your life to be better, so I suppose its like you evolve into a new you.
Not just for your friends, family or society, but for you and your life. We only get one shot at it.
There are so many opportunities out there in the world to enjoy. Travelling, spending time with your kids. I know it sounds crazy, but even starting a business and failing is a huge growth lesson. That next time you try you could become the biggest success in that field, with the experience that you learnt inside of jail.
I have started writing these article to hopefully help people reach there full potential and if you’re reading this I hope you get out and reach yours too.
In Six Months, Richard Will Be Free. He Has No Idea Where He’ll Go.
By Sam Harris
Richard will have gained his freedom from the daily visits to the library, and wondering when the guard will ever open the entry door to let us in. It makes me wonder whether Richard’s new-found “freedom” will be just another word, or perhaps, a new-found sentence.
Experiences
ISSUE NO. 21
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4 MIN READ
Stolen Culture: How Victorian Prisons Are Losing Aboriginal Art and Getting Away With It
By Kelly Flanagan
The handling of Aboriginal art and the ignorance around cultural significance by prisons in Victoria is appalling. This was my experience. It happened to me more than once, and no one was ever held accountable.
Experiences
ISSUE NO. 20
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5 MIN READ
Employment After Prison: Give Us a Chance
By Ashleigh Chapman
I don’t want to be on Centrelink – I want to work. I will cook, clean, waitress, pick up rubbish – anything. But I cannot because of a Police Check and Working with Children’s Check.
Experiences
ISSUE NO. 20
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4 MIN READ
The Impact of No Internet
By Daz Scott
Walking out of prison without keeping up with digital advancements is like emerging from a cave clutching a Nintendo 64 while everyone else is coding in quantum and you’re still trying to pay with Monopoly money in a now cashless society.
Experiences