The Darkness Returns

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Facing the darkness, the pain and cold travelling through the body, the soul taking me back to when I played alone when hell exists, the place my home I spend years, months, days wearing the mask trying to pretend there is no fear or pain
That I am happy, feel loved, nurtured at peace, strong, brave, carefree.
Masks are meant to protect not hide the anguish, the pain, suffering, hurt.
The struggle, the desire, the longing, want for a kind word, a gentle touch
The feeling of being wanted, needed, loved
Feelings that have been far from my soul so long, too long
They are barely echoes, the memories the times from long ago when I felt happy, loved, nurtured, strong, brave
Now I feel numb, cold, alone, afraid, weak
The darkness returns.
Facing the darkness, the pain and cold travelling through the body, the soul taking me back to when I played alone when hell exists, the place my home I spend years, months, days wearing the mask trying to pretend there is no fear or pain
That I am happy, feel loved, nurtured at peace, strong, brave, carefree.
Masks are meant to protect not hide the anguish, the pain, suffering, hurt.
The struggle, the desire, the longing, want for a kind word, a gentle touch
The feeling of being wanted, needed, loved
Feelings that have been far from my soul so long, too long
They are barely echoes, the memories the times from long ago when I felt happy, loved, nurtured, strong, brave
Now I feel numb, cold, alone, afraid, weak
The darkness returns.
A sweet treat using buy-up staples.
Tired from being told what to do. I am tired of love, tired of being deemed guilty, tired of my own remorse. I am tired of my own self-doubt, my own shadows and especially tired of my own face.
Hate’s a strong word, but for you it’s reserved. I hate what you’ve taken from me, my parents, my childhood and my glee.
My blue eyes look so drained, but I’m strong, I’ll make it through.